Ok. Don't panic champ! Sorry I can not get to this as much as I'd like, but please keep at it.also I think I got this is the wrong way round?
It's ok to stop and regroup, question assumptions, or verify things from first principles.
Let's look at the connector. Here's a Wikipedia article for the receptacle, and a photo showing pin 1 (marked with a tiny triangle, and also on the same side as the notch in the surround):
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Box_heade ... box_header
Pin 2 is "opposite" pin 1. Pin 3 is next to pin 1. In fact, all odd-numbered pins are on the same row as pin 1, and all even-numbered pins are on the other row.
You can also look at the connector. Again, you can see a photo with pin 1 marked. On your connector there should also be a protruding block that allows the plug to fit the socket in only one orientation:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IDC_(elec ... on_layouts
Now, when you look at the other side of the PCB the pins are mirrored, so it's worth double-checking the pin order, which is why I asked you to annotate the photo. I think you have been consistent, but it's possible to be consistently wrong, so please go ahead and check again. If you are right then you can be sure this time, and we can put that aside as "solved".
Statistics: Posted by ame — Sun Jul 14, 2024 10:03 am